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by Haunted Houses

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1.
So many thoughts with no words to use As I drive the highway under the moon As the darkness crept and whispered the blues A star projecting me lit a fuse I Drank to forget frustrating truths Or to celebrate eternal youth Lost in the absence that silence proves As new as forgotten news, I am you As I say; We'll never die Our perspective will multiply Into eachother's and other eyes So we can see darkness shine bright In the awakening there are no words to fight this light where darkness is a shade of pain and seeing ourselves just relieves a strain but its bleeds through like blood in veins causality will obtain the beauty of life in strife, insane; is another word for cure when everything is seen as pure And like the waves of the ocean the pull is her the pull is her
2.
A.S.T.R.A.L. 03:24
Went to school to retire Then I went and got fired as I sit around like a slob in my house smoke bud and listen to modest mouse as the years go by I contemplate suicide as I wait for my check to come in the mail my son is still in jail and we can't make bail there's away you can escape your own fate your own demise, eyes it's in the A.S.T.R.A.L. the only way out, you and all my friends locked up by some trends they can't make amends it sounds like common sense to you I---- When you see it you shine a light in the wandering dark and it finds you but all you got is wasted time getting by in your mind but its never on you you just keep running, running into the sunset til it comes behind you in the east and all I got is friends faded out in the streets
3.
Laura 03:26
Laura oh Laura won't you come back to bed I can't take back the things I already did I tell you, I was just playing the fool I understand but I want you to be with me because its cool I have nothing left in my head besides you carry my dead body back to bed because thats the only way I can sleep these days I got my heart in a maze of lies I can't change Laura oh Laura I need you now you held my head when my body was already buried underground I'm trying, I'm trying to have you back And these times are aligned the fact that I've been running blind thinking about you nothing but the truth is real to me now I'm in my eye and I'm just sad about you And I know how you hurt cuz I'm so down and I feel like you're always around cuz our fate is In my heart and it will be with me 'til I'm in the ground six feet down It will be with me when Im in the ground six feet down
4.
Darkness is like an ocean on a sandy floor Waves are just like days I ignored but the memories of those days can't fade So I stay awake at night dreaming about day now I deserve to be broken but you, you are the ocean that I'm drowning to save can't think of any other way now but now is, is all there is all there is now weeks and months go quicker when your lost but when I go I don't think I'll remember something but I think thats the pay of the cost because when I got here I knew nothing
5.
And I see you and me we're all aligned one with thee buried in time for all to see the summer haze to the autumn shade to where winter fades and back again I know where those stares in the trees point back to me opening doors to fall asleep in the winds breeze where my heart is free eternally for eternity
6.
So the bank foreclosed on me but its ok I got the job lookin' for cans on the street on the street so I can go and get my fix don't realize that i'm broken thats why I need it got a shopping cart for a car I live under the bridge, don't have to go very far maybe to the plant to recycle cans I think I'll kill myself in my dealers van because he keeps a gun there and no one has money left to spare I remember when I could lay my head next to you you could take away my pain now I feel the strain of the millennia I hold you to my heart one last time as I make my demise and move on back to you words are eyes that blind to truth
7.
New Jawn 02:40
I got the medicine you need either you're trying to stay awake or fall asleep it's all in your mind thinking your gonna die well, I already stepped in the other side you, you can't divide the higher eye is always in all ways alive, yeah I got the medicine you need either you're trying to stay awake or fall asleep it's all in your mind thinking your gonna die well, I already stepped in the other side you, you can't divide the higher eye is always in all ways alive, yeah Said I rode for the white of the Ramapo buried deep in the earth Said I ride the white of the Ramapo buried deep in the earth
8.
the moon swung above my head like some sort of ever present pendulum of what seemed to calculate the days of eternity. As I stood in the first night of the brisk autumn breeze, listening to the symphony of crickets frogs and shaking trees; the voices of those who had perished before me, I felt a tightness in my chest; Exhaling the last of my cigarette, the same brand my grandfather smoked up to the point he joined the for-spoken symphony,, I knew the feeling to be an accumulated omen of the same fate which was to take me there. What was I to do on such a lonesomely serene evening? Material distractions amounted to nothing more than pornography under such a sober introspection hauntingly presenting its constance to me. As I trustily tried to drink away my sorrows the knowledge only grew with intensity. Perhaps that was why I was so lonely, there was nothing to be satisfied. The lust for others was as weak as any other lust; only a lust; a weak id driven idol; any rationalized meaning brought about the destruction of any grained passion within me; however lustful that rationale was, it clung to me like the looming echoes of my dreams, closely. There was little that could truly please me. My self a bottomless pit of empty desire but yet so thirsty for something pure, true and full of aim. An aim to make the mark; not miss; yet missing was the only arrows I had ever shot in my life. I was a failure of sorts, in the eyes of my father and mother quite possibly the only eyes who watched me grow and had something within themselves of me truly left. I had friends, a lover that I cherished dearly, but it was all pissed away by misplacement of my thoughts; the borrowing of ideas which ruined any ounce of who I may have been, But where could I go, what could I do, what can I see? Who is here watching listening to me? Can you heal your own wounds with the time of the hours, which are really only days and years. Can you ride through the valley of dried flowers sober or must we stop and have a beer. I have no fear now; I know I can step through the door of whose questions are left unanswered by language and understanding of humanity without a key. This is what always frustrated me; academia and the advanced achievements it sowed. Yet how much they are all, we are all pretenders of owed; thinking we know this and that cell phones and sports stats the status quo, neuro-chemistry and history, anthropological theological mystical facts our goals and effigies ? yet how many of us live and see? What happens when death opens our eyes; do the details of human enterprise wail and cry? Do the memories of such things over power us to fear, or do they disappear baptizing our vision clear. So i lay healthy yet sick and bound, to the philosophies of those who stand on fictitious solid ground; when lucid reasons are all that make sense and knowledge only lives in present tense, yet we claim importance to our own hypocrisies; the remembrance of facts, those terribly elegant false liberties. But yet we all fall into linguistic contemplation and pretend we know our meditation; nothing but psychological sedation, hypocritical deterioration; hypocrisy is all that lives to be when death is the truth that sets you free, from you and from me, laying beyond any conditioned thought we could have ever grown to see, so I plea, return to the depths in which we came, im not sure how and i feel ashamed; but dont look for wisdom in answers, it can be found in death like cancer

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released September 17, 2014

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